A to Z 2026 - C - Contessina’s Collection of Human Treasures

“Cats!” she enthused. “Pretty rare, in the grand scheme of things. We’ve got zargles, kind of spongey, not very much like cats at all. You have to’ ve spent a decent time with humans to know they even exist, and even then, it’s easy to misinterpret them, to miss how special they are.

“They love their private lives. They love to hide away, or to stare out of some elevated surface.”

Here, the eavesdropping Shelby wondered if perhaps Contessina’s cat ever wondered if it had perhaps pushed this particular interest too far. She often found the cat on the porch alone, staring down toward Earth. What would it look like, if the cat somehow fell through?

“But there’s nothing like a cat’s bond. If it’s there, it’s…priceless. They’re perfectly content, when they choose to sit on their human’s lap, or somewhere very close. Their purr is remarkable. They’re mostly indifferent, as far as I can tell, to petting. They aren’t dogs. I’m told the term, if you find yourself doing it, is scritching their chin. They like their ears massaged. 

“They will thoroughly dominate any space they inhabit, make themselves masters of every surface, every dark corner, work their way into small enclosures, and sometimes seem to disappear entirely…But they will always reappear, especially when they wish to be fed, and then…they will make clear their preferences, and their human will bow to these wishes without question…”

Shelby watched, baffled. She was not a cat person. Contessina was of course scritching Michelangelo while reciting all this, its eyes closed contentedly.